ok, so I don't get it...
I did emacs -Q
and then loaded my emacs file, and eval-buffered it
and no issue
actually, I take that back
I evaled each sexp individually
no issue, so I eval-buffer
I reload emacs -Q, and eval buffer without evalling individually, and the white bar shows up
so, the issue seems to be when I disable the scrollbar, menu bar, and tool bar
if I execute the lines individually, it works fine
but as a group, it breaks
so, any idea why executing the lines together works differently then evalling them individually?